laography | all i do is win, win, win no matter what

[ Iwaizumi wants to scream. He clutches the drapes close to his face, so that no one that might come in will see his stupid Slytherin friend laying on his bed naked. Maybe, someday, there will come a day where he doesn't react to the bullshit that Oikawa does, but right now? That day is nowhere near the horizon. ]

Oh my god. [ Voice strangled, he lifts his eyes up so that he doesn't look below Oikawa's beltline when he rolls onto his side. He really does not need that right now, he struggles enough with just being the bastard's best friend and keeper, dealing with his other feelings while facing a naked idiot is nowhere near the top of his to-do list. ] I don't believe you. At all.

[ OIKAWA IS A DIRTY LIAR HE KNOWS BETTER.

But he groans and drops his head a little so that it hangs down, rubbing his thumbs through the drapes so that he can press them against his temples. There's schoolwork to be doing, but no. No, Tooru is in his goddamn bed, naked. After mastering illegal magic. Great. ]

What do you want, Oikawa.

[ and oikawa is perfectly fine with that to be honest. he's maybe a little bit of a glutton for punishment.

oikawa notices iwaizumi's eyes go up--of course he does--and he smirks, luxuriously stretching out a little further on the bed, entirely too comfortable on the bright yellow comforter. this isn't the first time he's been up here (like hell it is) and it absolutely won't be the last, and he'd mostly just showed up like this to rile him, not to get anything out of it.

(because oikawa knows his pathetic love for his best friend is his and his alone; he knows iwaizumi is better than he is and will find a witch to fall madly in love with and live happily ever after, while oikawa fills the empty iwaizumi-shaped hole in his heart with pretty girls and shallow flings.)

he props his chin on his hand for now, shifting to roll over on his stomach. in doing so, he takes the blanket with him to throw it gracefully over his back. you're welcome, iwaizumi. ] You said you were going to be done at five. It's five.

[ it's four thirty. ] And besides, my homework's killing me! I'm going to die, and you'll have to go on without me.

[ Making another strangled noise as Oikawa stretches out, he jerks his head up so that he's no longer closer to looking (or just closer at all to) his junk, eyes rolling skyward in a very why god, why me? expression. Because this is pure torture, and Oikawa does it because he thinks it embarrasses him. And it might've, at one point, but it's not embarrassment that fuels his reactions anymore. It's something a lot more mortifying, because Oikawa pretty much flings his way through the female student body of Hogwarts with reckless abandon.

He needs to not be in love with his best friend, and he needs to not find him stupidly attractive. Maybe one day he'll find pale, leanly delicate boys named Tooru less appealing. ]

It's four-thirty. [ Iwaizumi is going to strangle him with the curtain chord, there's no two ways around it. At least he's covered himself now, although that's only better visually. Now his comforter is going to smell like Oikawa, and he's going to die, because he's either going to sleep with his face stuffed into it and wind up smothering himself, or he's going to try and burn it and wind up setting himself on fire. ]

God. Are you fishing for me to let you copy off of mine?

[ oikawa's head pops up from where he'd dramatically flopped over on the bed, swooning backwards with his hand on his forehead to try and make iwaizumi understand the gravity of the situation. he was dying. he really just didn't want to touch his transfiguration homework at all, especially when he'd just learned how to basically transfigure himself and that was far more interesting than turning mice into teacups. ] Well, if you're offering!

[ you have the worst personality, oikawa. etc etc. he sits up in bed, wrapping the blankets around his lower half so as not to give iwaizumi a heart attack before he's 18 and rests his chin in his hands, elbows on his knees. from here he can admire his best friend, the red tint to his cheeks, the scowl on his face. oikawa is maybe a little glutton for punishment, he thinks. to be in love with iwaizumi is so easy, because he's just a good person. even if he loses his temper sometimes (a lot of the time), oikawa knows him as the kid who loved to collect stag beetles and played volleyball--and then, quidditch--with his best friend. and he can reconcile those two things together into one person, the guy he's been in love with pretty much his entire life.

how pathetic is that?

he smiles. ] If you keep staring at your books all day long with that serious expression, you're going to give yourself wrinkles before you even graduate! No girl's going to want to date you if you always look so mad at everything, Iwa-chan!

I'm not!! [ SCREAMS INTERNALLY ] You're hopeless, I swear to god.

[ He knows he's going to let him do it, Iwaizumi doesn't know who he's kidding. They grew up together, he knows everything about Oikawa, things that no one else does. He knows about the aliens, about the insecurity, about why he fights so hard every day with quidditch. He knows that the person that taunts him is only a facet of Oikawa and not who he is down to his core. Sure, it's part of him, it's not a lie, but it's not the whole package. Just the wrapping paper.

Slamming the curtains shut in Oikawa's face, and thus slamming them on these thoughts, he storms around the outside of his bed to his trunk. Iwaizumi kicks it open and starts digging around in it, pulling out one of his quidditch shirts and a pair of basketball shorts so that he can shove them through the drapes and hopefully into Oikawa's face. ]

I'd kill you, but that'd just make you into a patron saint to the female population if I did it so close to a quidditch match. Put some clothes on, you piece of shit. [ Anger and frustration with Oikawa is easy to wield, makes it easier to hide the truth from everyone around him. Someone out there probably knows - it wouldn't shock him if that Sugawara knew, maybe, he's pretty perceptive and seems to have the same problem, even if Sawamura is a whole hell of a lot less awful than Oikawa - but he's going to feign ignorance for as long as he possibly can. ]

[ the basketball shorts do in fact hit oikawa in the face, mostly because iwaizumi's aim is killer (one of the many reasons why he's arguably the best beater in the school; oikawa has plenty of bludger related bruises to prove it) and he makes a little "oof!" noise when he's suddenly hit in the face with fabric. really, it seems like oikawa's mission to get iwaizumi to stop stressing over his homework for five minutes was a total success, which is basically the most important part of his appearance here. (well...half. the other half is because he's selfish and bored and this is a terrible combination.) ]

No underwear? Iwa-chan, I didn't know you were that kind of guy. [ now he's just being a shit, and oikawa chuckles, sliding his long legs through the curtains so he can stretch fully out in order to get the shorts on and the shirt over his head. all of iwaizumi's stuff fits him kind of weird--he's a good two inches shorter than oikawa (which tooru will literally never let him forget, ever) but iwaizumi's much thicker, much bulkier. the shirt hangs oddly off his arms but he cuffs them anyway and pokes his head back out, smiling at his best friend's back. ]

I can't believe you weren't even impressed. Do you know how hard it is to be an animagus? Especially something as beautiful and cute as mine.

[ Satisfied when he feels contact with Oikawa's face and earns himself the noise, Iwaizumi pulls his hand back out and tries to fix his trunk now that he's rifled through it. It's pretty therapeutic, refolding things and tucking them back in. Sure, the house elves would fix it on their own later in the night when they bring back laundry, but he's going to do it now because it's better than thinking about Oikawa naked on his bed and putting on his clothes.

The calm only lasts a minute or two, though, as it so often does with Oikawa. ]

I'm not giving you my underwear!! [ That dies a horrible death when long, pale legs slip out of the curtains, and yet another strangled sound leaves him as his face goes bright red. It's that exact moment that he spins around, scrubbing his hands over his face and up over his head, fingers knotted in his dark hair. This is awful. Oikawa is awful. And yet here they are, and he doesn't want to turn around. ]

What, some kind of weasel? [ He knows he's an ermine. He kind of wants to know if maybe he'll always be that beautiful white, or if he'll turn a charming brown in the warmer months. ] Kind of explains that month when you were pretty quiet, though. Hey, maybe try that again some time.

So rude! It's an ermine, not a weasel. A stoat. [ his fake flinch is playful and he wags his finger to try and tell iwaizumi otherwise, because he's quite happy with his animagus. between the four of them, he is absolutely the best looking one (so, you know, like normal) and being an ermine allows him to get into places and do things quickly, efficiently, and cutely. so it's the perfect vision of oikawa in a tiny, animal form.

he'd change back right now if he didn't just put on iwa's clothes, honestly.

pushing himself out of the bed and dropping his feet on the ground, oikawa tosses open the curtains in order to actually look at iwaizumi as he talks. he's folding laundry like an angry mother, which is kind of cute and hilarious all at once, as iwaizumi tends to be, and he considers making a comment about it, but for now, he'll let iwaizumi continue his folding as he gets up and sweeps by him to pick up his parchment in order to copy his homework. ]

Ha, ha. It was hard, because you did so many things I wanted to tease you for! [ he drops down in iwaizumi's desk chair and spins around once, twice, three times. he'll get to that homework... really...he's obviously procrastinating a little bit. ] But now I can do that whenever, so I hope you're ready for me to visit you lots! Luckily, I don't have to worry about you having girls over!

[ FLASHES A PEACE SIGN ]

[ Iwaizumi does actually flinch as Oikawa goes sweeping past him, because he's resisting the urge to jump him and throw him back onto the bed if only so he doesn't go anywhere near his schoolwork. Unfortunately, jumping him and throwing him onto the bed kind of gives him awful images, so he'll just lose himself for a bit longer in organizing his trunk. There's a few things in there from Oikawa himself - such as various shirts with aliens on them; a pair of pajama pants that have the stereotypical big-headed, big-eyed aliens everywhere; a plush stag beetle that he's kept since childhood - but he doesn't linger on them, because that would call attention to it.

Oikawa gives him enough hell as it is, and Hajime knows it. ]

Don't you have anyone else to bother? Like all your admirers? I'm sure they'll fawn over you plenty if you shift for them, and they wouldn't ever think to tell the headmaster about the fact you're an unregistered animagus now. [ Tone dry, he finishes packing his trunk back up, slamming it closed again so that the lock actually catches. It won't keep everyone out, but at least people will struggle with it if they try to get into it. (People being Tooru.) ]

You're a pain.

[ SLAPS HAND DOWN ]

Ow! [ not that that even hurt, but oikawa pulls his hand away where he smacked it and rubs the top of it with the fingers of his other hand, pouting a little bit. he so didn't deserve that! (he totally deserved that.)

but, he makes a face as he leans back away from iwaizumi, reaching for his wand and attempting to balance it on his nose. despite the ridiculousness of his pose and even the lightheartedness to his tone, the words that come out of oikawa's mouth are startlingly sincere. ] Mmmm...no, 'cause there's no one else I trust enough to tell.

[ he moves on to trying to balance the wand on his upper lip, making a dumb kissy face in the process. it's honestly the truth--iwaizumi is and always has been oikawa's backbone, and his honest first thought upon successfully changing into an ermine for the first time was i have to tell iwa-chan. not just because he'd think it was cool, like they were showing off stag beetles they'd caught as kids, but because he knew that iwaizumi would not only not tell anyone, but begrudgingly let him be excited about it, too.

iwa-chan was great like that. oikawa knows that much for sure. ]

[ He absolutely deserved that, and Iwaizumi knows that it didn't actually hurt him any. He eyes him as he pouts, but makes no move to go closer, crossing his arms and glowering at him as he waits for whatever excuse that he has this time.

But the glower starts to fade in the face of Oikawa's sincerity, because he can never hold onto that anger when the true Oikawa comes out, the one that hides under the pretty face and the levels of insecurity that he attempts to cover up with his trashy behavior. Even his stupid antics with his wand aren't enough to distract from what he says, and the meaning behind it all.

So all he can do for a moment is tighten the grip his fingers have on his biceps, rocking his folded arms back and forth with a little wiggle, and then sigh. And once he's run through his emotions, he drops his hands from his arms, shrugging as he accepts his lot in life, even if there's a lot of frustrations that come with it. ]

I guess it's too much to ask you to not do it to get a rise out of me, at this point. [ Iwaizumi reaches out to grab his face in a big hand, squishing his cheeks a bit (and gently, even!) as he snatches the wand off his upper lip. ] You know it's cool, I don't even know what you're expecting me to say.

Mmmft. [ iwaizumi's hands on his cheeks are dumb and oikawa makes a dumb face to accompany them, sort of whiny as he pats at his wrists with his free hands to try and get him to let go. once he does, oikawa rubs his cheeks, watching him warily with his wand. oikawa can definitely recall a time where iwaizumi sent him to the nurse's office with a not-so-nice hex....to be fair, he also really deserved that, too. ]

Something like, "Wow, Tooru, you've grown so much as a wizard! I can't believe how charming, handsome, and talented you are~" [ he says that with a laugh, mischievous and bright and warm, making a grabby hand for his wand. it's clear he's not actually serious--but he still would've liked to have heard that from his best friend. ] You would've been way more impressed if I turned into a stag beetle or something.

[ also, yes, that is way too much to ask. oikawa will do that until he dies. (preferably of old age, surrounded by pretty women but maybe in bed with iwaizumi.) ]

[ Man, learning hexes was great. Joining dueling club was also great, in the grand scheme of things, but between classes and quidditch and being Oikawa's keeper, he couldn't keep up with the meetings as much as he would've liked. Not that it matters too much, since Iwaizumi is still welcomed there when he has the time - even if he's not an official member - and he has plenty to do with his dumb, attractive best friend. ]

A stag beetle wouldn't suit you. [ Said matter-of-fact, because it's true. He things they're fascinating in the way that Oikawa thinks aliens are cool, but if Oikawa turned into one... It just wouldn't work. That's not who he is. An ermine? Sleek and beautiful and soft, clever and quick? Yeah, that's who he is.

He twirls the wand between his fingers expertly, bringing his now-free hand up to pat one of his cheeks. He even gives him a bit of a smile. ] You did good, Tooru. You're gonna use it to drive me insane and get into trouble, but it's cool and you have grown a lot as a wizard.

[ oh

oikawa wasn't expecting him to actually do it.

as he pats his cheek, tooru starts to turn red, a flush that blotches over his cheeks and his face and leaves him there sort of flustered. he has to blink at him for a second, because when was the last time iwaizumi called him by his name?? and just. stares for a second. RIP oikawa, he's dead of iwaizumi's little smile and his warm hands and he's just. dead. that was too many nice things all at once.

oikawa clears his throat, flicking his gaze away for a second in order to not be completely and totally blown away by his stupid sometimes-cool best friend, who totally just threw him, him, oikawa tooru, for a loop. ] Wow, Iwa-chan. [ he mumbles, eventually, lifting a hand up to cough and hide his smile. ] I think that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.

[ he says it fondly, though, so. at least it's not an insult. ]

[ Huh.

Iwaizumi watches his reaction with interest, eyes following the spread of his blush as his hand draws back. He was going to make a joke, give Oikawa his just desserts, but... well, now he kind of can't. Because that is the cutest thing he's ever seen in his life, and he's going to commit it to memory, and hold it close to his heart for as long as he can. It isn't very often that he can get a reaction like this out of Tooru, after all, and when he does?

They're kind of amazing, for assorted reasons. They're amusing but they're also... really endearing. ]

Yeah, well. When you're not copying off of my scrollwork and being a dick, you're hardworking. It would kind of suck if I didn't at least tell you when you actually do a good job. [ Hajime shrugs, turning the wand around in his hand to offer it back to him, point towards himself, trusting that his best friend (and crush) isn't going to zap him, either intentionally or accidentally. ]

What am I, a dog.... [ oikawa huffs, but he really only huffs to hide the fact that that compliment really kind of got to him. he feels sort of validated and proud, like when he first became a chaser and a damn good one. impressing iwaizumi isn't that hard, though, because sometimes oikawa thinks that if he could be half of what iwaizumi thinks he is, he could be a legend. it always makes something warm and perfect curl up in his chest, because oikawa is insecure and doubting and often hates the things he does, finds them not good enough--nothing will ever be good enough, like he'll never beat ushiwaka face to face, chaser to chaser, but iwaizumi, sometimes, makes oikawa feel like he could do anything.

taking back his wand, oikawa sets it down on the desk by the parchment, considering his lack of pockets in iwaizumi's clothes. he returns his attention to his childhood best friend, folding both of his arms and resting them on top of the chair to put his chin on top and watch iwaizumi with a hint of fondness in his light brown eyes. ] But...thank you.

[ he smiles, warm and fond. ] Now I can come visit whenever. And I plan on it~

[ Iwaizumi deigns not to give that comment a response, because, really Oikawa. Really. That's way too easy, and he's trying to be nice. Sometimes, Oikawa can be sincere, so sincere that it's almost painful to even look at him, and when he's like that it's hard not to respond in kind. So he's not going to be the one to ruin the moment by taking an easy opening, and instead he's going to make sure that he knows exactly what he thinks of him, really. Oikawa is one of the most amazing people that he's ever met, even if he acts like a piece of garbage to cover up for certain insecurities.

It's why Hajime cuts him off and reprimands him, usually. He doesn't see why he should ever feel the way he does, deep down. Not when he's amazing, hardworking, perfect the way he is.

But he'll never say it, and instead he just shrugs a shoulder and crosses his arms over his chest, protecting himself from that warmth, that fondness, resisting the urge to reach out to stroke his fingers through his thick, soft hair. ]

You're a pain, you know? [ But there's no heat, and he cocks his head with the slightest smile on his face. ]

all i do is win, win, win no matter what

*garbage

*flawless

*hanger

LISTEN

OH DID I HIT A NERVE HANGER-KUN

YOUR JEALOUSY IS UNBECOMING, IWA-CHAN

YOU FACE IS UNBECOMING

;`A;!!! HOW RUDE

SHOVE IT

｡゜(｀Д´)゜｡

ヽ(＃｀益´)ﾉ

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